My Pleasure Project

The last two days, my Pleasure Practice has been to tune in over and over again to my pleasure. I'm learning that pleasure has a lot to do with not resisting what's going on. And there have been some moments that are more difficult. And there have been moments where I've gotten really turned on and felt strong from that. This is not the most articulate post, but I want to keep posting. I'd rather be inarticulate and honor my process than not post anything at all.  Today, I feel a little like it will be hard to keep up with these practices because I'm like an island right now.

Today I flew home from NY to Phoenix. On the plane, in between naps, I attempted to stay tuned in to my turn-on. What this ended up meaning was interpreting my sensations as stimulating and sensual rather than uncomfortable. This was a very interesting experience and experiment. What I learned: 1. I don't have to do anything to be turned on except decide to be turned on 2. This is way out of my norm, and actually the opposite of how I've been deciding to live for about 6 years now 3. I repeatedly have resistance come up that feels like I don't have permission to be turned on 4. In the last 30 minutes of the flight I decided to give up and just revert to whatever sensation came without effort. I was cold, cramped and anxious to be off the plane. And I wondered, why is this the experience I keep choosing when I could learn to flex my muscle and live in the turned on place? There were definitely more things, and I'm sure they'll surface again to be written ...

My current project is pleasure. I'll say more on this later, but essentially finding ways to turn myself on-what works and what doesn't. This is for the next-minimum-nine weeks. I decided to start with something that may seem obvious, but isn't always for me. Touching myself. I've learned that I spend a lot of time not connected to my body, so I have to give myself permission to stay tuned in when I touch myself. What I learned creating this: it works better for me the more slowly I move. Also, I created a video that showed a lot more, but I remembered I get much more turned on with some tease. Some almost nipple is way hotter than straight out nipple. And I've been loving this song. I didn't listen to it while touching myself, but it really filled in the pieces when I edited.